Fear of Flying!

Hey Guys!

I just got back from a few days in Melbourne, and I wanted to do a quick little post talking about my fear of flying.

Since I was little, I've had a fear of flying; I think it comes from my Dad. As long as I can remember he has been terrified of going on planes, whether it be a 20 hour flight or a 2 hour flight. I remember once when I was about six years old, he was due to catch a flight to London for work. My Mum dropped him off at the airport, and shortly after getting back home, she received a phone call. My Dad was crying, and he hadn't boarded the flight. She drove down to pick him up and when he made it back home, he was a mess. Shaking, pale, in tears; it was really strange to see my Dad like that, and when I found out it was because of a plane, I guess that's how it started.

I'm not the kind of person that has a crazy wanderlust, or needs to travel often, so when I was younger and I had to catch planes, I didn't quite understand how it all worked. There was something about being locked inside a giant metal tube in the sky for hours that wasn't very appealing.

I think the worst part about flying is waiting to get on the plane. That for me is the real 'fight-or-flight' moment. When you are through security, and you can see your plane from your gate, and you still have a chance to turn around. That is the absolute worst feeling in the world. I can't eat when I'm going to catch a flight, and I'm surrounded by restaurants and people chowing down. All that goes through my head is 'why am I the only one panicking when fear of flying is a really common fear?'; it doesn't make sense. Once I've chosen to fight the fear, and I'm on the plane and in my seat, it is time for take-off.

I've always hated take-off. Back when I was a kid, I thought the plane took off at 90 degrees and it was going to flip over and fall upside-down onto the tarmac. I don't think that anymore, but I still hate take-off. I can hardly sit on hills in my car if they're steep enough - the angle freaks me out. I hate the sudden thrust of speed, and the G-force holding me back in my seat. As the plane takes off, all I'm hoping for is to look out the window, and see the wide open blue sky above the clouds. That's when I can relax.

Usually, when my plane has taken off and we are cruising, I calm down a little. I still feel pretty uncomfortable, and sometimes I forget to breathe properly, but most of the time I'm just listening to music, and waiting to land. 

Then there's turbulence. Now, I tell myself before I fly to expect bumps. It's inevitable, and it's just air pockets and very rarely anything serious. However, even with those thoughts in mind, the first small series of bumps make me very anxious. The little side to side shifts I can handle with very little effort, but when the plane shakes a lot, drops at the rear, hits an air pocket and suddenly drops a few feet, that scares the shit out of me. Whenever there is turbulence, I immediately look to the windows to see the density of the clouds. On the flight home this afternoon, it was like someone had painted the windows grey. Needless to say, it was a very bumpy ride.

Coming in to land is much better than taking off, but I'm not overly fond of the flippy feeling my stomach gets when we make the big turns or start to descend quickly. I hate it when my ears pop, so having them do so 5 times in the space of a few seconds is absolutely awful. When flying into the Gold Coast from the south, the plane makes a huge turn around over the ocean. Combining the feeling of sudden descent with the feeling of being completely sideways is not a feeling I would want to experience every day. But despite all that, the sound of the landing gear clunking into place is one of the most comforting sounds of the entire flight. Then when you take that first step onto the tarmac; there's nothing sweeter than being on the ground.

I don't know what it is about flying that I am scared of - It's not claustrophobia, and it's not a fear of having no control. I know they wouldn't let us fly if there was any reason we couldn't make it down. I know the pilots and cabin crew are highly trained to assist in any emergency - big or small. I just hate flying, and it's so frustrating there's nothing I can pinpoint. I just hate flying, and there's no other way I can put it. 

That's it for now guys!
Let me know what you are scared of by leaving me a comment on this post.
Hopefully, I'm not the only one dealing with this fear.

Love Rosie x